Voices In My Head - Phone Program | The Communication Blog

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Voices In My Head - Phone Program

By Ganesh Hardy


Next week I'm launching my own phone call service. For just fifteen dollars a month someone in my company will make unlimited phone calls for you, pretending to be you. This means that you will no longer need to make that weekly call to your mother and listen to her endless list of ailments all while trying to pretend you're interested. A representative from my company will not only make the phone call and pretend that he or she is genuinely interested (which you never do) but they will also have an internet database of additional ailments that your mother can use when she calls your siblings.

Another sort of call accessible by my new support will probably be calling in sick for your employer. The individuals that I have hired are all former actors so they can pretend to have a whole number of difficulties which could buy you a day out of work guilt free. From sicknesses to household deaths to lost pets, my people are so convincing that your boss will be sending you flowers including a "We miss you" card even though you will be out on a town enjoying your day off.

One from the most popular kinds of calls that my assistance offers stands out as the "break up" call. In an attempt to go the extra mile I have put together a unique team of callers that will not just call your boyfriend or girlfriend and break up with them but they will also call all of their buddies and spread nasty rumors about them so that you just look like the victim. By the end from the week you will be the hero on the relationship for all the heartache you've had to endure more than the course of one's relationship.

On the flip side in the break up call could be the "make a date call". This call offers the buyer a chance to contact that sexy guy or girl from school or jobs that they do not have the courage to call. And my callers won't stumble and stutter. You might be phone prowess could be the talk from the town as the most popular people desire to date you!

I believe this new service is quite heading to eat off. We already have a big number of advanced orders from some large companies and federal government agencies. The White Home has asked if we can call Iran and tell them to stop producing them glimpse bad. I guess George Bush figures if he creates the call himself he'll end up with the wrong words or phrase and will end up declaring war. You know, like last time.

Outside with the defined phone calls our clients can make particular requests as well. For example, should you need somebody to call your mother in law and tell her to stop bringing that foul smelling meat loaf with her each time she visits, we'll take in care of it. Or should you require someone to call a co-worker and tell them you will be married and their advances are doing you sick, we can do it.

The aim of this assistance is to remove individuals from acquiring to make any uncomfortable phone calls themselves. This is just the beginning too. Next year we plan on offering a line of threatening phone calls. I know I could have applied a program like this in high school.




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